Gareth Bale – Tottenham Hotspur to Real Madrid for a rumoured $200m. This is basically a done deal, for all of Tottenham’s posturing, this deal was done months ago, as Tottenham have proved by spending the best part of $970b in the transfer market on all manner of players. Likelihood Rating: 99% (saving the 1% for Gareth Bale – Tottenham to Manchester United)

Cristiano Ronaldo – Real Madrid to Manchester United estimated at $160m. Whilst logically Real Madrid could fund much of the fee for 24 year old Bale by selling 29 year old Ronaldo to United, it seems the age of galacticos is coming back at the Santiago Bernabeu stadium, and Ronaldo will be at Madrid for at least another year. Likelihood Rating: 33%

Cesc Fabgregas – Barcelona to Manchester United for c. $80m. I can’t see this happening this month, however if Fabregas is still a bench bunny in January, he may well move. Likelihood Rating: 25%

Wayne Rooney – Manchester United to Chelsea for rumoured $70m. Rooney is going nowhere, United won’t be selling one of their top players to one of their biggest rivals. With Rooney putting in a superb performance when United played Chelsea, he’s laid down a marker that says “I’m staying here” Likelihood Rating: 25% (33% if United sign Ronaldo)

Baines & Fellaini – Everton to Manchester United for combined $80m. Baillaini as I’ve just christened them, are definitely going to be plying their trade at Old Trafford by the end of the window. They might not be the super heroes that many United fans will desire, but their Premiership pedigree is not in doubt. Likelihood Rating: 100%

Ozil and / or Benzema and / or Di Maria – Real Madrid to Arsenal for frankly anyone’s guess. Arsenal have done so little business in this years transfer window, they are delighted to announce the free re-signing of AC Milan’s Mathieu Flamini, so they are being linked to many players. Of these, Di Maria is the most likely to be the deal done, at a rating of 50%

And a summary of the rest of the big ones….

Luis Suarez – Liverpool to Arsenal (0%) or Real Madrid (33%).
Kaka – Real Madrid to Arsenal (25%), Manchester United (0%), Liverpool (50%)
Fernando Torres – Chelsea to Atletico Madrid (50%)
Demba Ba – Chelsea to Newcastle (75%)
Javier Hernandez – Manchester United to Tottenham (10%)
Iker Casillas – Real Madrid to PSG (10%)
Eliaquim Mangala – Porto to Manchester United (50% but hope it does as UK soccer fans will have loads of fun with his firstname!)

Rooney can be backed at odds of $15.00 to finish as EPL top scorer, this is great value.

As previously reported, long time Chelsea target Edinson Cavani has decided he prefers the fluttering eyelids of Laurent Blanc to the romantic gestures of Jose Mourinho and has opted for a move to Even-Richer-Than-Chelsea-Paris-St-Germain (ERTCPSG). The fact that PSG have seemingly met Napoli’s $180m buy out clause might be another reason to move the Paris than London. So Chelsea have switch attention to 22 year old Christian Benteke for Aston Villa. Benteke joined Villa from Genk for $14m on a 4 year deal only last season, and finished with an impressive 19 EPL goals. It is understood the giant Belgian has handed in a transfer request and Chelsea is his most likely destination for c. $45m. A snip.

Chelsea are currently joint second favourites to win the 2013 EPL outright at odds of $3.10

Or / and Chelsea are lining up an $80m bid for Liverpool’s bite happy want away forward Luis Suarez. Suarez who believes the UK press is hounding him plans to solve the problem by moving from Liverpool to Madrid or Paris or seemingly London where it believed he has briefed his agent that a move to Chelsea would suffice. Yes that’s right Luis, you won’t get any press coverage in London, at a club that has had more than it’s fair share of racism and player behaviour problems. Suarez will at least feel at home playing alongside John Terry, John Terry, Eden Hazard and John Terry.

Quick round up of the rest of the gossip, along with our forecast as to whether it is likely to happen or not.

Manchester United will return with a slightly larger bid and secure the signature of Everton’s Leighton Baines, yawn. This is going to happen, fact.

Patrice Evra will get all shirty and leave United as a result of his place being put under threat, with Real Madrid, ERTCPSG or Monaco his destination. This will happen, he is a moody little fella and will probably end up back at money bags Monaco.

Real Madrid chief quote issuer Florentino Perez has stated that Cristiano Ronaldo will retire at Real Madrid, either Ronaldo needs to look out for flying tackles in training, or Perez believes the sunshine/world’s biggest club/$500,000 per week/working with Zidane formula is right for CR7. He is going nowhere, this season at least.

Barcelona have been told to do one by Barcelona fan Jose Mourinho when they came asking if David Luiz fancied playing out. Of all the clubs in all the world, the least likely Chelsea are to sell to is Barcelona. Conclusion: David Luiz is staying put.

The superbly named Julian (not that bit) Draxler (that bit) lately seen bossing the Schalke midfield is coming to the EPL with Chelsea, Manchester City and Arsenal (last resort on his behalf surely) fighting it out for his signature. Our verdict is a move is on the cards, and Draxler will be pulling on a blue shirt next season. Whether it is sky or darkish, we don’t know.

Little known, bit part Spurs player Gareth Bale is not going to Real Madrid. At least that is according to the aforementioned Madrid boss Florentino Perez who claims they have no interest in signing a really good player from a team they have a good relationship with. Hold on. Spurs and Real Madrid have a good relationship do they? Ok. Modric. I think Spurs chairman Daniel Levy has cocked this up. For all his blustering about not selling Bale at any price, and world record fees of $190m being bandied about, he has just talked himself and his club out of a monster pay day. Never mind that Bale is Spurs and they are a truly one man team. $190m buys you a good 4 or 5 players you need to play alongside new signing Paulinho to make the team very good indeed. Verdict. Bale to move to Manchester City or PSG on the last day of the transfer window for $100m as Spurs get desperate for the green backs.

And finally…the biggest news of the week is surely Usain Bolt to play for Manchester United. Bolt is tipped to turn out for his beloved reds in Rio Ferdinand’s testimonial against Sevilla on August 9th. That should be quite some wing speed. Hopefully he will be able to control the ball better than United’s last ‘super-fast-next-big-thing-flying-winger’ David Bellion…..

Gareth Bale continues to be linked with a big money move to Real Madrid, I can’t help thinking that Tottenham will cash in on their dive-a-lot golden boy this year. This one will run and run, but will end up with Bale playing for the King of Spain next season.

The book on the next Manchester City manager is pretty much a done deal with Manuel Pelligrini priced at an uber short $1.05. Jose Mourinho is priced at $11.00 but it is an open secret that he is going to Chelsea, so Pelligrini it is then!

You can get a slightly better price on the almost as certain Roberto Martinez to be the next Everton manager at odds of $1.17, with Neil Lennon available at a massive $13.00, again, it looks like a sure thing for Martinez to swap pies for toffees.

Back with Real Madrid, who intend to fight off the amourouse advances of Manchester United for their superstar Cristiano Ronaldo by making him “the best paid player in the world”. Ronaldo was widely understood to to be keen on a return to United, however with the retirement of Fergie and that fat Madrid cheque book being wafted under his nose, we think he’ll stay exacty where he is.

Ajax’s 21 year old midfielder Christian Eriksen looks set to turn his back on interest from Manchester United and Liverpool by joining Borussia Dortmund in a bargain £10m deal. Eriksen would be a direct replacement for Bayern Munich bound Mario Gotze, and looks like great business if they can pull it off.

And finally there cannot be a day goes by over the next 2 months where Manchester City are not linked with one big money signing or another. Today is is the turn of Galatasaray’s Brazilian midfielder Felipe Melo to be linked with a move to The Etihad Stadium. Melo who has been capped 22 times by Brazil is thought to be available for approximately £15m. We think this is just gossip whipped up by an agent, and won’t go anywhere.